There are a few things I should probably blog about, but today I’m going to blog about something I’ve been pondering for the last few days.
As you probably know, I live on my own, in a different state from my closest friends and family members. While there are things that I really like about where I am now, living here also forces me to be very independent, somewhat stubborn, and tough. Contrast this with the fact that I’m also rather retiring and not very adventurous. It means that I don’t like asking for help; I would rather figure out a way to do something myself, or do without. Honestly, I think my personality would be this way to some extent no matter where I lived.
For the past year, I have been talking about DLF’s—Dear Little Friends who pop up in unexpected places and do amazing things for you above and beyond what you expect from them as relative strangers. Yet I usually use the fact that I am a female living on my own as an excuse not to be a DLF myself. It’s very hypocritical, but I’m not sure how to break the cycle. Where does one draw the line between reaching out to others, and protecting herself?
This is a rather vague post since I don’t want to give specific examples, but does anyone out there have any thoughts?
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3 comments:
I am not very good at being philosophical...but I will give it a whirl. Anyway, I think sometimes it's less a matter of forcing yourself out of your comfort zone and more about being open to circumstances you come across naturally. I mean, it's easy to make excuses/rationalize not doing something even when it's right in front of you, you know? But I totally know what you mean about making excuses...it's easier and more comfortable. I don't really know where I'm going with this, but I guess for me it mostly comes down to seeing an opportunity and then pushing myself to do it, rather than ignore it. That is probably not helpful but there you go! :)
PS: You're always very helpful and giving, Marcue, I'm sure you've had more DLF moments than you give yourself credit for!
Thanks, Control! It's easier to be more helpful and giving when you know a person. I think I need to work on being open to those I don't know as well. But then, this is probably true of everybody. You have definitely given me something to think about.
This is funny because I was JUST thinking about this last night. It's so easy to accept help but harder to give it! I think a lot about all the people that helped me when I first moved to Bloomy, and how I've never really done the same for anyone else, which isn't right. So I don't really have any advice to give, other than solidarity.
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